Comrades! There was a major attack on our temple of Communist thought today when a Capitalist Pig made his way into the hallowed jungles of JNU. Yes! Incredulously incredible as this may sound, he actually entered the campus, perhaps making his way to that “other” college, the American Slave Provider across the street. Though he claims to have come to attend a quiz, it is a known fact, Comrades, that this Capitalist was an emissary of America, to spread their Imperialistic claws into our great campus, but we are smarter comrades! For in the forests of our land, he was lost! And was made to trek for miles before he reached the venue. We all know, that any competition goes against the hallowed principles of the Almighty Super-Studmuffin (Lenny and) Karl Marx, and hence this event too went to our Comrade Napoleon!
This was a minor victory, but it is a sign of impending doom. You know who’s behind this, Snowbell! Yes, comrades, Snowbell along with Goldstein! The only way to counter this is by sticking more Marxist pictures on the wall and causing more Tiananmen Squares (the pity, comrade! You can use this word and google it, unlike China!) but we are getting there.
This… Is… JNU!

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